I have been feeling a bit down for a little while.  Not depressed or anything, but not feeling overly joyous either.  My back has been the cause of daily pain for me since about January, sometimes to the point I’ve had tears in my eyes it hurt so bad.  I don’t think I’ve complained overly much about it (Right, Brian?? 😉 ), but it is just silly to keep on that path.  I started to go to a chiropractor this week and saw my x-rays.  I’m no doctor, but I’m pretty sure your spine is supposed to be in a straight line and not a wavy one, right??  Oh, and apparently your neck is supposed to have a curve in it and not be stick straight.  Who knew??

I am starting on a treatment plan that is going to be multiple adjustments a week for several months.  Anything to help with the pain would be an improvement.  I’m tired of giving the excuse of “Mommy’s back hurts”, as to why I can’t sit on the floor and play with the kids.

Thanks for all the nice comments on my last post.  I wasn’t fishing for compliments, but they are nice to hear.  It’s just depressing that I don’t fit into 75% of the clothes in my closet.  I’m hoping that once my back feels better I will feel more like walking and doing some exercise.  I don’t like how my body feels right now.  It’s getting harder to breathe, too.  My sports-induced asthma may turn into full blown asthma before too much longer.

The weather here has been gloomy and cool this spring and summer.  We already have gloomy and cold most of the Fall and Winter, so maybe a Vitamin D deficiency is part of the problem.  Of course, it could be that there isn’t much good news of late.  Losing a friend to cancer and the news in general is nothing but depressing.

I feel bad for complaining, truly.  My life is not in turmoil like so many others, so I feel a bit like a charlatan in having these feelings.  It seems I don’t have a valid reason for feeling blue, since we still have our jobs, our kids, and we are *mostly* healthy.  Life could be worse, yes, but it also could be better.  That is why I am trying to see past what is bringing my attitude down.

I am trying to change.  After the loss of my friend, it has really made me evaluate what is important in life.  Life is too short.  Focusing on family and feeling better is my priority right now.   I’m walking down the path…ever so slowly.

2009-07-15_2490